Saturday, June 18, 2005
Ache..

Why am I crying this way? Why do I feel that there's something missing? Why do I feel this strange feeling inside me?

For the past days when I was in school, it seems that everything was perfect -- I already got to see my bestfriends, my batchmates, as well as my teachers..but it seems there's something missing. I always find myself searching for someone..There's a certain space of emptiness in me that only a very special person could only fill..I tried to rub those thoughts away from me, but why? I don't understand why it always comes back to me. I told a person about this and he said that maybe that person is already the one you've looking for..I don't know but I'm confused..

The person who was speaking about the one also told me one matter that was going on about a certain person's life. I was in shock when he told me that this certain person had already know about it. Even though he told me how he knew that this person knew about it..I still don't get it. He also added that he doesn't mind about the matter because I'm also his friend. (There were also other matters we discussed about this certain person but I don't want to tell them due to their confidentiality..one of these issues really hurt me badly.) I really don't understand..and when I had buried these thoughts in my mind..a strange feeling was felt..it started to hurt so badly..the feeling that may be called..ACHE..

A while ago, I just cried concerning both issues..but what am I really crying about? My heart is aching..but for whom? I told myself before that I don't want to think about this matters because of fear of emotional pain..but why am I crying? Where did this bitter ache come from? Would I even get an answer to all these questions?

Cheska's thoughts at 10:57 PM

Wednesday, June 15, 2005
Back to School..and..Missing #2

Yup..you got it right..today is my first day in school as a Sophomore student. I honestly felt really nervous and excited as well. Even though I had come back to where I graduated my Elementary years, I can’t stop thinking of what am I going to face during this whole school year..

So, I had come and returned to the walls of my dear Alma Mater. I could obviously see the looks on their faces……………………………………………………………………
all of them were in SHOCK (particularly people who DIDN’T EXPECT me to come back..) Showing them that I’ve really come back, I all showed my classmates a cheerful smile.

I was quite surprised that we’re still going to stay at the same classroom when we’re still in Grade 6. Anyway, our adviser now is Ms. Weng Abad who also happens to be our Math teacher. We have three new students (exception to me and Patricia Barza because we happen to be Claireans before..). The “only rose among the thorns” – her name is Ayoen Hong, apparently a Korean. I easily befriended this girl, thinking she might be an anime addict like me, but unfortunately, she isn’t. Anyway, I still became friendly to her. The other two both came from Ateneo De Davao University. Their names are Alto and TJ.

I absolutely had fun during the time we were meeting our subject teachers. I noticed that there are still some old teachers like Sir Alfred, Ms. Mercado, and Ms. Gaudia. I was also delighted that I got to see my friends again. It’s really good to be back..n_n..

~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~

Wuhuhuhu..T_T..Today, I just missed one of the super kilig moments of my whole anime life!!! Waaahhh…!!!

When I got home from school, I immediately asked my mother what happened in the anime series I was watching in the morning, “Nadja” (originally, “Ashita no Nadja”). Then, I got one of the most disappointing news I ever heard in my entire anime life – I missed today’s episode that happens to show my #2 anime crushie, Francis Harcourt (or Hartcort in some websites)!!! Waaahhh…!!! I just want to scream!!!

She also told me that Nadja and Francis had finally met and they…they…even kissed!!! (Waaahhh…!!! I promise to buy the DVD of that series…ASAP!!!) One thing she wonders is the reason why Francis stayed so silent throughout the whole episode. The way I know him is he doesn’t really talk too much…it’s just it’s not like his normal self. Then, as the episode comes to a close, mom said that she saw two Francis and one puts on the Black Rose mask. I was also confused by this but mind still made a very wise guess. I said, “Probably the reason of Francis’ silence is he is torn between confessing Nadja his true identity and keeping this secret to himself to protect himself as well as their relationship. As far as I can remember, Black Rose and Nadja met one time in Vienna. Nadja shouts at him at the same time asks him why stealing is the only he could think about to help the poor. She also tells him that she knows one person who helps the poor but in a good way (the one she’s mentioning is Francis). While they parted, Black Rose removed his mask (but still didn’t show his face) and seems to be downhearted (probably thinking of what Nadja said).” Waaahhh…!!! Still…I didn’t get to see Francis in such a super kilig episode!!! Oh, well…I think all I have to do is to wait for the time I would be able to buy the series…

>>By the way, here are pictures of Francis and Black Rose to prove how handsome they really are..n_n..:

http://www.hjsm.net/goldwolf/comic/images/200407/1248187-ajaRE!5Zl6.jpg

~..+Francis Harcourt+..~

http://www.hjsm.net/goldwolf/comic/images/200407/1248187-RcA4Q2NNd9.jpg

~..+Black Rose+..~






Cheska's thoughts at 9:13 PM

Monday, June 13, 2005
New Layout..

Yeah! Finally, after 2 and a half hrs (plus 2 hrs last Saturday so that means about 4 and a half hrs) this is my new layout. It's really cute and I love it..n_n..

Walang masyadong news kasi medyo tinatamad ako today. Anyway..enjoy!


Cheska's thoughts at 2:02 PM

Tuesday, June 07, 2005
Childish Hatred..A Decision..Turning Back..and a Contract?

This is the first time I'm ever going to write something so seriously in my blog..

"I HATE HIM!" -- these are the only three words that are ringing in my head after a phone conversation. I know this is just so immature of me, but I can't help it -- I HATE HIM. I know I've already said these words to him, but I only use these words to make him put into a hault. Tonight, I half meant it already. I don't know but he's just so...(I wouldn't let the words out, but I think you know what I mean..) Krizsa knew about this, but she only said was this:


Cheska's thoughts at 10:54 PM

Monday, June 06, 2005
Huling Hirit sa Summer..

Yeah! Finally, a great summer escapade with my family..n_n..

Day 1.June 3..Friday

We left the house at around..quarter to 7. Bea and I actually planned that we should leave at around 4 o’clock (because we want to watch a show on a local channel..We figured out that leaving early would make us arrive there on time and we could watch it..) unfortunately, our father already arrived past midnight last night because of his job. So, we have nothing to do but to go with the flow.

We got to Subic probably between 10 o’clock to 11.30 (I’m not really sure about the time..). The place was absolutely breathtaking! All you can see is green!

Then, we decided to stay at a local hotel called Crown Peak. It’s located far away from downtown. When we finally got into the room, Bea suddenly jumped unto the big sofa bed near the TV and began scanning for something to watch. In the meantime, mommy and daddy began fixing their stuff as well as ours. And of course, I was just there sitting at the sofa bed watching whatever is on TV because I was sick..

Afternoon came and we decided that we’ll go to El Kabayo, a place where you could ride horses just like in Baguio. When we finally arrived at our destination, we were amazed by how beautiful the place is. It was a big ranch filled with green grass. When we looked further inside, it has all the equipment from boots to equestrian caps. Finally, Bea got her horse and started to ride off. I didn’t want to ride because I’m worried that my condition might get even worse or the horse might get sick because of me. Anyway, I had a fun watching my sister (who feels like a real equestrian like Mikee Cojuangco..n_n..) riding a horse..n_n..

We also went to the Jungle and Environmental Survival Training Camp or just JEST Camp.

Day 2..June 4..Saturday

Day 2 has finally come and now we’re planning to go to Ocean Adventure and after that Zoobic Safari. At Ocean Adventure, we watched some Sea Lions, False Killer Whales, and Dolphins perform. I must say that the False Killer Whales and Dolphins we saw today performed better than what I actually saw at my field trip. We also got to look at different sea creatures at the Aquarium and buy some souvenirs at the Souvenir Shop. (Daddy bought me a beautiful desk lamp..n_n..)

Then, we went to Zoobic Safari and first stop is (drum roll please) – ehem…the tigers. When we got there, we laughed when we saw a tiger relaxing itself in a pool! It has its head lying on the rim of the pool..hehehe..n_n..Then, there was another tiger who was just sitting on top of a rock. When everybody decided to get their cameras out, it even stroke a pose! Next in line is a short visit to the Serpentarium where all you could see are various snakes and reptiles. We also went to the Day Care Center, the Honeybee Farm, the real Zoo (I forgot what it was called..), the Tigers' Den (this time tigers are locked up in their cages) and the last stop was the Savannah. It was spectucularly beautiful as you get to see all the animals running free (of course except for the serpents and tigers..n_n..)

Back at the hotel, we had also some funny moments. That night, Bea and I were watching Chobits on Animax. After a few minutes, mommy sat down beside us and began watching as well. While watching, I could hear clearly her laughter. There are really some times that my mother is beginning to love anime as well..ahihihihi..n_n..

Day 3..June 5..Sunday

Nothing really happened interesting on this day because this was the day of our departure back to Manila. Anyway, to top it all, all of us had a great time. Next time, I want to go back to Subic again..n_<..


More News..
Before I forgot, for this whole trip I was actually coughing, blowing my nose off, and obviously having a terrible fever. In fact, I was almost rushed into the hospital. Anyway, thanks to everyone who has been praying for me to get well..n_n..By the way, I can't really talk because my voice is just so jerky probably it is because of my coughs. Before I forget, my first day of school is moved to June 15 so that means..no school yet for me!..n_n..

Cheska's thoughts at 12:54 PM

life's sweetness..

The sound that sting one's ears, the smell of damp paper left outside to humidify and dehydrate, the unconscious minds and treacherous hearts were all but a part of the melodrama.

innocence..

our usual conversations..

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Designer Eric Sim
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