This is the first time I'm ever going to write something so seriously in my blog.."I HATE HIM!" -- these are the only three words that are ringing in my head after a phone conversation. I know this is just so immature of me, but I can't help it -- I HATE HIM. I know I've already said these words to him, but I only use these words to make him put into a hault. Tonight, I half meant it already. I don't know but he's just so...(I wouldn't let the words out, but I think you know what I mean..) Krizsa knew about this, but she only said was this:"THE MORE YOU HATE, THE MORE YOU ____"
(I guess you know what it is..) Well, I don't know if I really something special for him. Yeah, I like him, but I don't think..right now. I'm just his friend -- simple as that. There are also some characteristics I hate him for like his neverending kayabangan and kahanginan (Grr..that made my blood even boil..). So now what? Do I still like him or not?
I've thought of that already. I decided that...I'm through with him. I guess I need to go find a better one. Anyway, just like Krizsa said, school will be starting soon and that would be the place to look. But, while I was taking a shower, I remembered someone.
I thought I totally forgot about him already, but I guess the feeling keeps on coming back whenever I just think of his name. I'm coming back to my Alma Mater -- not knowing what might happen. What if I get to see him again? No, no..he already has a girlfriend, but..they have probably broken up, right? No, bad thought, bad thought. But..what would he think? Could he be the one that will really replace the other one? Or..
Argh! So many thoughts! Why am I turning back?! I'm not coming back because of some guy but because of my future! Ok..probably I have the perfect solution..I will make a contract. A contract that will state that I'm only allowed to fall for a guy in an Anime series..Yes! Perfect! I also have other obligations like my studies and to start a new life all over again. Oh well..lovelife is still not on my list yet..n_n..
Cheska..signing out..
Cheska's thoughts at 10:54 PM
