Monday, October 03, 2005
I Miss You (Kimi Ga Daisuki Ga)

I’m still haunted by this feeling since last night. I miss him a lot already, even though we met and talked yesterday. But, I really miss him. To tell you the truth, I’m trying to stay away from him as much as possible. I’m just trying to stay away from rumors or “jumping into conclusions” from people. I even said to myself (even my mom):

“Let him do the talking first, then you talk. Don’t make the first move.”

When we crossed our paths yesterday, I was surprised that he was the first one to notice me. He was even the first to greet “hi”. It gave me quite a surprise because I was usually the first to notice and greet him. I felt glad that we’re actually feeling a lot closer than before. I also remembered what mom also said:

“Don’t ever get the boy to notice you. It is better just to steal a glance at him from time to time.”

I did what my mother told me to do. During class, I’ve been stealing glances at him. Whenever he catches me, I just turn my head to another direction – obviously, avoiding.

I like him a lot. Whenever I think of him, I always wish he’s here beside me right now – talking and cracking crazy jokes. This the first time I felt something like this. I’ve got so many crushes in the past, but the way I feel for him is somewhat different. I feel that I want to be with him always.

To end this entry, I just want to tell you that I know I’m still young for this. I know maybe many of you now don’t want me to get hurt because I have a fragile heart. I always hear that from my friends especially those who are so close to me. Don’t worry. I don’t want to cry again because of a guy again. I’m tired of being Ms. Teary-Eyed-Because-of-Love. I’ll be careful. I promise.

Right now, all I want to say to the person I madly like is:
“Kimi ga daisuki ga.” (Find out to know what it means. Hint: It’s Japanese.)


Cheska's thoughts at 9:42 PM